Saturday, November 24, 2007

Evolution?



I found this news article on the Drudge Report today. It's from the Daily Mail, an online newspaper in the UK.

It's an interview of a woman who had herself sterilized because she thought having a child would be too harmful to the environment. I've been waiting for more of these stories to show up. I think this is a logical conclusion to reach when the Earth is your god.

At the risk of sounding cold, this person is really doing the rest of us a favor by removing her stupidity from the gene pool. Collectively, our offspring have just gotten a tick smarter statistically. She almost goofed this up a few years ago but 'terminated the pregnancy'. Golly, it's a good thing she terminated a 'pregnancy' and not a fully formed and growing baby. That would have been nasty and distasteful.

The next conclusion a person like this could reach is that people themselves are inevitable pollution generators. The fewer, the better! And since they should affect change globally by acting locally they will off themselves. Why not consider making this a large-scale event at a coordinated time and location? It will make the clean-up more eco-friendly, not to mention convenient, for the rest of us. Maybe your remains could be dumped in the ocean to feed all manner of sea life. On second thought, that may generate methane gases, a dangerous greenhouse gas, besides disturbing the environmental circle-of-life that Man has no business interfering with. A better option may be to burn the remains in a carefully controlled process to minimize emissions while harnessing the heat energy to generate electricity to charge electric cars for the remaining eco-friendly persons. I think you'll agree that this is the best option.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Oh man I love your sense of homour!

But seriously, those are great ideas.

By the way, shouldn't she/they be getting a Darwin award or something?

Robert Pepper

teason said...

Prior to burning, I think they should all line up to go down a giant slide, where, at the bottom they smack into a blade of a giant, electricity producing turbine (in a location where there is not enough wind for a wind farm). Kind of like a human Hoover Dam.

Or, they could ride stationary bicycles (with generators meant to power compact fluorescent light bulbs) in a plastic tent where we could recover water from the sweat that condenses on the inside surface.

Melanie-Pearl said...

you boys!

i don't know how f-ed up you'd have to be to kill someone else for the sake of the planet.

if you're really that convinced, wouldn't you just kill yourself first? this is seriously beyond reason. hopefully most people will see the mental illness in this story.